Testimony

Last week I was asked to write down my testimony.  I thought about what things I know to be true and why, and I wrote them down.  I know that I am young and I have much to learn.  I know that some may read this with a doubtful heart, untrusting and unbelieving.  I don't blame you... some of the things I have written here probably seem pretty crazy!  But I do want to declare that everything I have written here is sincere and honest and truly comes from my heart.  There are many truths I don't know or haven't discovered, but what is written here is a personal testimony of what I have seen and experienced in my life and these experiences are things I could never deny.  I challenge anyone who reads this to search for truth.  Ask God.  Don't just decide what you think is true or what you want to believe.  I can promise with all of my heart that if you sincerely want to know and are willing to humbly act on the truths that you discover, God will answer you every time.  It may not be at the time or in the way that you want, but He will answer how He knows that you need to hear it, and by accepting it and following it you will feel a special peace and joy that nothing else in this world can give you.

Here is what I wrote down...  

My name is Linsey Hunt.  I am 23 years old.

And this is my testimony of truth.

I know that God exists.  He is real.  He is my Father.  I know that He loves me infinitely, cares about me, and is constantly aware of my situation.  I have a relationship with Him.  I feel Him in my life.  I know He exists because I have felt His love for myself and for other people.  I know that He loves each and every person that exists, has existed, and ever will exist—no matter who they are, what they believe, or how they choose to live their life. 

I know that He hears and answers prayers, because He has heard and answered mine in ways so special, unique, and powerful to me that I could never deny that they came from God.  I know that He always has my best interest in His plan.  I know that I have the ability to choose what I do with my life, but when I consult Him and follow what He wants for me, my life turns out far better than it does when I believe that I know what’s best for myself.  I know this because I have tested it in so many ways, and have seen both ends of the spectrum.

I know that Jesus Christ is real.  I know that He was not only a mere man, but was the Son of God who came for a very special purpose.  I know absolutely with no doubt in my mind that He performed the atonement, which allows me to recognize my weaknesses and change them.  It allows me to transform.  I know this because I have learned how to utilize it in my life and I have learned that I can not do it alone, that I can not do it until I truly and sincerely trust in Him and humble myself to Him, and give my heart to Him.  I know that humility is the greatest form of strength and that it is absolutely necessary in order for change and progress to occur.  I know this because I have tried to change and progress without it, and have failed miserably every single time.  I know that Jesus Christ is my brother and He loves me because I have felt His love.  I also have a relationship with Him.  I know that we can feel His love if we put ourselves in His shoes and sincerely try to be like Him.  I did this every day on my mission, and it allowed me to understand His love and come to know him better than I ever had before.   I also know that He is real because I have asked God, and He has answered me.

I know that there is such a thing as the Spirit, or the Holy Ghost.  I know this because it is the way in which I am able to have a relationship with God and Christ.  I know the Spirit is real because I have felt Him guide me, comfort me, witness the truth to me, and also leave me when I have not been worthy.  The lowest times of my life have been when I have pushed the spirit away and not allowed Him to stay with me due to my poor decisions.   I have seen Him change people’s lives as they learn to listen to Him and understand what He teaches.  I know that in order to understand Him we must look on a higher level.  We don’t know of His existence through proven facts or science.  We can only know of His existence if we humble ourselves and recognize how little we actually know and understand, and if we pay attention to ourselves and how we feel, rather than what we see or what man teaches us.  I know this because I have tried to find truth solely through logic and learning of man, and I have learned that my ability to progress is incredibly hindered when I rely solely on this without the aspect of spirituality.  There is an extra strength and power that comes only from humbling myself towards God. 

I know that it is always important to keep our minds and our hearts open in order to learn truth.  I know that truth, or reality, can be relative but there are also eternal truths that are absolute and do not change according to the beliefs or decisions of a person.  I know that truth is light and allows us to see things more clearly and understand things.   I know that truth is what truly sets us free, every time.  

I know that God calls prophets and spiritual leaders in order to help guide us.  I know that Christ organized a church when He was on the earth, and I know that this church is now restored to the earth as the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.  I know this is true because I sincerely asked God, and I received an answer from him so powerful that I could never ever deny it.  After Joseph Smith had the first vision he stated “I knew it, and I knew that God knew, and I could not deny it, neither dared I do it”.  I feel the same in regards to the answer I received from God about this church.  Not only do I know that I received it and that it came from God, but I also know that He knows it, and to deny it would be a pathetic attempt to lie to myself and to God.  I have studied many religions.  I really enjoy studying religions.  I have participated in many different religious services all over the world.  I have asked God about the truthfulness of other religions, and this is the only answer I have received about the truthfulness of one religion.  It is the only church that has complete truth because it has God's authority and power, and I know that this is true from the answer that I received from Him.  I do however also know that truth can be found in so many different places and many religions hold a lot of truth, and I sincerely enjoy discovering that truth all over the world through different cultures and belief systems.

I know that having commandments or disciplines in different aspects of life are important and vital in order to be truly happy, have real peace, and be free.  I know that there are consequences for making wrong decisions, but I am also grateful for all of the mistakes that I have made because I have learned through opposition.  I also know that obedience makes me stronger and happier, although it is always so difficult.  I know that life will continuously be a struggle, but it is meant to be that way because in order to learn we must work.  Everything that is worth anything requires work.  I know that by being disciplined, I have more agency or more options of what I can do, therefore I have a greater freedom and potential.

I know that both the Bible and the Book of Mormon contain true stories that really happened and were written in order to help us come closer to Christ.  I know this because I have asked God and He has answered me, and I have applied both of the books to my life.  I look to them as a source of inspiration, revelation, and knowledge of the truth.  I also know that many other books contain truth and am grateful for the opportunity I have to study and the desire I have to learn.  

In my life, nothing has made me more content than to learn of and follow truth, and then share that truth with others and watch them learn of it and follow it.  Because of this, the mission that I served in Argentina will forever be dear to my heart because of the truths I was able to learn, follow, and share while I was there.

I know that I am divine.  I know that each person is divine.  I know that it is truly possible to love every single person.  I know that respect is a godly trait.  I know that relationships with people are a grand part in God’s plan because He needs us to see the value and divinity that is in each soul.  I know that charity truly never faileth.

More than anything, I know that I am just a human being with little knowledge and understanding, but a divine potential.  I am not perfect.  I do not know everything.  I don't even know a lot!  I believe things that probably aren't true.  I also probably know things that are true and I don't recognize them yet.  I don't always act in accordance with what I believe or know.  I am a normal human being who struggles, fighting an inner battle every single day.  I have so much to learn, experience, and discover.  But my greatest hope and desire is to do all that I can as honestly and sincerely as I can in order to reach that divine potential that I have, so that I and many others can experience the greatest amount of peace, joy, and freedom.  And I know that the only way to get there is to try.  

www.lds.org

www.mormon.org

Falling in love

ok OK. I know it has been forever since I’ve written. I’m sorry. Listen… it has just been a chill couple of weeks with few grand events outside, but many grand changes that have gone on inside of me.  It may seem kind of silly that I needed to come all the way to India in order to seriously take time and ponder about my life.  However, I am a firm believer in shaking things up, living diversely, and exploring life, which is why I love travelling so much… because each time I go somewhere, I learn things I never could have learned if I would have stayed in the same place doing the same things.  Putting yourself in a different situation where you are uncomfortable and have to learn to live or act in a different way is a great way to open your mind and open your eyes and see things how they truly are, no longer blinded by the culture that we so comfortably follow after staying for so long.  It really makes you think about your life and yourself and who you are, and what you’re doing!

So… like I said, we haven’t been out and about a ton lately.  We have gone a few places. I’m sorry the photos are few.  Most of the places we went to recently I shot almost entirely in film, which is another reason I haven’t posted recently.  But here are a few from the last couple of weeks…

The other day we celebrated Krishna's birthday!  We went to a Hare Krishna festival (yes like the Hare Krishna's in Spanish Fork) and we had to chant 'hare krisha hare krishna krishna krishna hare hare, hare rama hare rama rama rama hare hare' 108 times as we stepped on each one of these stones

this is our vocals teacher performing with his friend... amazing!

Then we went to a Hindu festival for Vishnu's wife who they dressed up as a fish, which was very special because it was the first time this has ever been done!

This is at the Sikh Gurudwara... see the story below :)

Some photos from beach road pretty near to our house... this is a submarine that is now some sort of museum

Now, you are probably wondering why this blog post is called falling in love.  I’m sure you are all thinking I met someone. Right?? Wrong.  Sorry.  No boy/girl love story here (don’t worry mom!).  This one is much more exciting and deep and real than your average romantic comedy.  This is something that is achieved through work, trial, conflict, discomfort, respect, awe, deep emotion, learning, change, and those little moments when you stop and look around you and just take it all in.  I am falling absolutely and deeply in love with the culture here.

I had an awesome experience the other day.  For my project I am speaking with a lot of gurus from different religions.  Yesterday we went to visit the Sikhs! 

It is one of my favorite religions to study.  In fact, when I first got here I told Doctor Nuckolls that I love Sikhism so much if I weren’t LDS and didn’t know the truthfulness of the gospel, I would probably be a Sikh.  He told me that was the first time he had ever heard that, hah!

These people are INCREDIBLE.  They are so incredibly kind and inviting and soo down to earth.  We showed up and about 30 seconds after we arrived, two ladies showed up.  One was a Sikh, and the other was a Hare Krishna who was from a different province.  She is also studying religions all over India and happened to be in Vizag right now.  We became great friends! :) She told me all about everything she had learned in Sikhism and how amazingly these people had treated her.  You see, she came down to Vizag and on her way, ALL of her bags got lost.  She arrived with not even 10 rupees.  She knew there was a Sikh Gurduwara (temple) here in Vizag and she found her way to it, because in her town she had been very close to Punjabi people (where most of the Sikhs live) and she hoped to find some help there.  They took her in, gave her food, clothes, and paid for her ticket to go back home.  She translated for us all day and it was fun being surrounded by English, Hindi, Telugu, and Punjabi.  We also represented all different religions… LDS, Hinduism, Hare Krishna, Bramakumares, and Sikhism.  All kinds of different languages and cultures and religions in that one group, yet we all got along so well and enjoyed each other’s company so much!  I interviewed the main priest there and they gave us milk and cookies, and lunch, and performed a little concert for us.  I left just feeling so uplifted.  As we drove home in the rickshaw, the ladies that were sharing with us mentioned to Rajyalakshmi our translator that they had seen us at the Vishnu fish goddess temple the other day.  Then another guy got on and we looked at each other and recognized each other.  He works at Barista—the internet café where I always go.  All of the workers know me!  So we smiled and waved.  We rode home and I watched outside and just had that feeling, you know?  Where everything is just so good.  Where there is hope for the world.  Because there are some seriously good people, and differences don’t matter.  I felt incredibly grateful for this time that I have to be here to experience the things I am experiencing and especially to learn the things that I am learning.

It has been a profound couple of weeks.  I have spent SO much time thinking and pondering.  As I have mentioned before, I love documentaries. Mmmmm. :) So sometimes I get on documentary kicks and just download a whole bunch and watch them all.  The last couple of weeks I have been watching documentaries (and other movies) basically every night.  I have randomly become interested in learning about human trafficking, so I have watched a lot of incredible documentaries about that, along with some other movies that I have been thinking a lot about.  I want to talk about 3 movies/categories that I have been thinking about.  They all interconnect in certain ways.

So the first one, as I mentioned, is human trafficking.  I watched multiple documentaries… 3 of which I would totally recommend—‘Child Sex Trafficking on the Internet—Selling the Girl Next Door’, ‘Human Trafficking Documentary’, and ‘Trafficking of Children in the United States’.  They are all on youtube.  I knew that trafficking is a problem all over the world, and I even knew that it occurred in the United States.  But I did not realize that it supposedly occurs more in the United States than anywhere else in the world.  What???  Ok, this is seriously a big issue.  The documentaries are very informational, and the true stories are seriously heartbreaking.  But I think it’s important to be aware.  This happens everywhere.  This happens in the US.  It is one of the biggest money-making industries next to the drug trade.  This happens in Utah.  This happens in our neighborhoods!  PLEASE.  Learn about it, research it, become informed.  Watch the documentaries… they really are good (although one of them in the end turns into kind of a funny preacher trying to get the audience to pray with him haha but hey, sometimes cheesy is good).  This of course is only one of many many issues going on in the world today, but I think it is worth being aware of because that is one of the best things we can do to stop it.  

The second one is called ‘America the Beautiful’.  There’s also a sequel, and they are in the process of making a third one I believe.  This is available on Netflix.  I just bought it on iTunes because it was so worth it to me.  It talks about America’s obsession with beauty, looking into topics such as make-up, plastic surgery, modeling and advertising, and many more.  It is a must-see.  I feel like being outside of America has helped me to see our culture more clearly.  Now, I know there are always both positive and negative aspects of every culture.  But I have never really realized how deeply obsessive and addictive America and Western culture is with such superficial topics.  Basically it all boils down to our bodies.  How we view them, how we portray them, how we use them.  So many of us focus on fulfilling our carnal desires… needing attention whether it’s positive or negative, doing whatever it takes to make our bodies ‘happy’.

The sad thing is how much the media knowingly plays a role in this, and how much it affects us.  In the first ‘America the Beautiful’, many people in the media industry are interviewed.  They are very aware of the weaknesses of humans, and they use that in order to make money for themselves.  Now, I’m not saying that the people in these industries are purely evil or anything.  I don’t believe they necessarily want people to feel bad about themselves.  But they do continue to do what they do just in order to make money.  Just as in the human trafficking industry (and pornography and drugs and alcohol and whatever else).  In fact, I was absolutely shocked that Craigslist used to be the leading online website that hosted human trafficking (of course illegally and “secretly”).  The interviewee in one of the human trafficking documentaries interviewed one of the company leaders at Craigslist about what exactly is being sold in their adult section of the website.  He had no words, and could not even answer her.  After a long awkward silence, he eventually just cowardly walked away because he couldn’t full out lie to the camera and of course couldn’t tell them that he knew exactly what was going on and that they were doing absolutely nothing to stop it.  This caused an out roar in the news and Craigslist ended up shutting down their adult section.  That same time, the other leading site for human trafficking—backpage.com—had their sales go up by hundreds of thousands of dollars immediately.  It is totally obvious what is going on, but nothing is really being done to stop it.   In the media industry, many people knowingly play on the strings of human weakness in order to make money… causing the society to become weaker and weaker in its morals and values and causing addictions to rise.  Does a person’s ability to perform sexual activities determine their value?  Does a person’s weight, facial structure, or hair determine their worth?  No. It does not.  But what’s sad about our culture is that we are lead to believe that these things do determine our worth and value.  Is it all the companies’ and media’s fault?  Of course not.  We are the ones who are making the choices to listen, to follow, to become obsessive, addicted, and eventually desensitized to the worth of a human soul.  So it is a two-fold problem.  But how can it be stopped or fixed?  Is it even possible??

Being here in India has helped me see that it is possible to have a society where people actually do live morally.  Where people do actually value the worth of the human body.  People respect each other.  We went to a movie in the theater the other day called Chennai Express.  It, like many other Bollywood films, is a love story.  And how much physical contact was there in the movie? None. They never even kissed, not once!!  In fact, Shahrukh Khan, one of India’s most famous and popular Bollywood actor, has always had a rule that he won’t kiss in a film.  He has only broken it once in his most recent Bollywood film for specific purposes.  Compare that to any Hollywood movie on the other hand… even the PG rated ones.  Completely opposite.  India’s society is not perfect and with time it too is worsening (I won’t even talk about western’s current influence on India and how the emerging western culture is in many ways negatively affecting the country) but there are so many people here that follow a standard that is rare to find in the United States, and anywhere in the western world for that matter.  There are people that are sincerely kind and generous, and expect nothing in return.  People who live disciplined lives.  Yesterday I was talking to a Jain nun (see photo).  They are currently in a festival called Paryushana where each day for 8-10 days they discipline themselves in something.  They fast during the whole 8-10 days and practice different disciplines such as silence all day or refraining from anger, etc.  I asked the nun how she does it.  I mean… it is not easy to discipline yourself!  Especially on things that are so carnal and so strong.  She told me that what you must do is not listen to yourself.  Wait… people have always told me ‘listen to your heart’.  Now this Jain nun is telling me not to!  She said ‘whatever your heart desires, don’t do it.  If you feel like sitting, don’t sit.  If you feel like eating a lot, only eat a little.  Don’t give in to your body.  By doing this you become strong and you become free.’  Hmmm… interesting right?  Guys.  There are people that actually do this.  They actively and consciously control themselves and their lives and learn how to treat people correctly.  It doesn’t just come for them, they actually work at it and transform themselves.  Cultures like this still exist!! 

Now, that brings me to the last movie I wanted to talk about.  ‘V for Vendetta’.  Ok, not a documentary, I know.  But so good.  I had seen it before but totally forgot.  There are so many controversial things you can take from that movie, and you can also interpret it in many ways, but there is one specific thing I want to talk about.  After the movie we had a little debate between the 3 of us on whether it was right or not for V to torture Evey without her consent and without her knowing in order for him to teach her a lesson.  There are two quotes he says that I really like. “Artists use lies in order to tell the truth”, and “There is no certainty—only opportunity”.

I used to think that anything at all helps.  Any type of humanitarian aid, any type of service.  Then I started studying development work and I learned that there are not only good ways and better ways to help others, but there are also some ways that appear good but actually hinder a person or a community from progressing.  For example, supporting pan-handling.  Yes, there are those few instances where the person really is just asking one time and the amount of money given is used for something important and a person is really helped out in that moment.  But all too often, pan-handlers earn their livings on the streets, and continue on the streets.  They don’t progress.  Usually, progressive homeless shelters are better places for them to go in order to get out of their situation rather than just receiving aid from people every day and using it every day to only buy the necessities for that day.  If people stopped supporting pan-handling, it wouldn’t exist.  The homeless would have to find other ways to support themselves and would hopefully turn to other options of progression rather than staying on the streets.  This is just an example and of course is not always true… I think following the spirit in each situation with pan-handlers is important so we are able to know whether or not our dollar is going to help that person progress or support them staying on the streets in the same place forever. 

ANYWAY, my point is, that there are SOO many options for us to help out in the world, and make it a better place.  But we also have to be careful with what we choose to do, because sometimes we can think that we are helping when we really aren’t.  Well how do we know??  Studying and researching and observing are all of course important.  We should carefully weigh out our decisions and think them through beforehand.  But at the same time, we are not going to be perfect.  What even is perfection??  No one is perfect.  I don’t believe that people are so black and white… either good or bad.  We are all both good and bad.  We are human yet we are divine.  We have good intentions often and sometimes not-so-good intentions that we usually try to overcome.  Sometimes our actions show our goodness and sometimes they show our carnality.  So here is what I have concluded.  After realizing that there are SO many ways to help and so many things to do, I became overwhelmed and honestly kind of just gave on the idea of doing anything.  Why?  Because I wanted to make sure that all of my efforts were worthwhile and that I was doing the best possible thing I could do.  But how was I ever to know?  There is always so much more we can learn, how can we possibly know if what we are doing is the very best thing we can do?  On my mission, this is what I learned.  We do the best we know how, we consult with the Lord, we trust in Him, and we act.   I became so overwhelmed and lost hope so much that I decided to kind of just give up on it.  I became discouraged.  I thought “anything I do to try and better humanity will just be outdone by someone else anyway and won’t really make a difference”.  But the truth is, if I have the best of intentions, if I research and try to do things the best way I know how, and if I consult with the Lord, my efforts will never be wasted.  There were so many times on my mission where I wondered if I was doing things right.  Times when some people told me to do one thing but others said to do another, and my companion and I would feel that we should do something different.  So what we did was the best thing we knew how to do.  I came home from my mission knowing that I was not perfect, but I did the best I knew how with the abilities that I had.  Now, with our culture and world just spiraling into a state of being totally out of control, we have a duty.  Because we are aware that there are issues, and we are not happy with them.  We may not know the best solution.  In fact, we don’t know it!  As John Legend says “everybody knows that nobody really knows just how to make it work” (ok ok so he may be talking about a relationship, but I think this applies to everything).  We are all just perfectly imperfect human beings as I like to say, trying to do things the way we know best.  In V for Vendetta, was it fair what V does to Evey?  Was it moral?  Was it humane?  No… probably not any of these things.  Did it teach her a lesson?  Did it change her?  Yes it did.  Artists use lies to tell the truth.  But what would have happened if it wouldn’t have worked?  Well, that was a possibility.  V didn’t know if it would have worked or not.  But the truth is, there is never certainty… only opportunities.  There are opportunities all around us.  We don’t know if they will work, but we will never know if we don’t try.  We don’t know if it is the best thing we can do, but at least it is something.  Now, that doesn’t mean just go along blindly doing whatever whenever.  We can be smart.  But we certainly can’t judge, because we don’t know peoples’ backgrounds.  An abusive mother perhaps knows no other way of raising a child, because that’s all she knew herself as a child.  Does that mean an abusive lifestyle is best for the child?  Absolutely not.  But that also doesn’t mean we should judge the mother for not knowing very well how to raise her child or not doing a perfect job at it.  We need to give people the benefit of the doubt.  And the child may resent his mother his whole life, but the truth is, we can’t redo the past.  All we can do is take the opportunities to do the best we know how and hope that things turn out for the best.  If we trust in the Lord and strive to follow Him, then things will turn out for the best.  That doesn’t mean we won’t make mistakes.  We have to make mistakes.  Those mistakes are not only beneficiary to us in our growth, but they often lead us to where we need to be in just the way we needed to be lead. 

So, those are my thoughts.  I have been thinking a lot about all of these things, and feel like I have been learning a lot about myself and my role in the world.  I am capable just as anyone else.  I am powerful and can make a difference in the world for the better.  That doesn’t mean change an entire nation.  It means being an example and a light for individuals.  That is, after-all, how something is truly changed.  A real change is deep-rooted and takes place in the details.  A nation will only change if each individual changes, and it happens one by one.

I think I have decided what exactly I want to do with my life.  I have been thinking and praying and fasting, and I’m feeling good.  Some good and exciting things will be happening in the future… :)

If you made it this far, congratulations and thanks for reading all of my ranting about life and the world and everything else, hah.  I promise all of my blog posts won’t be novels.  It’s just nice to have somewhere I can somewhat organize my thoughts since they are usually all over the place in my head. :) Mmmmk until next time.... Peace outtttttttt!

My Life is a Bollywood Movie

Well well, the week has flown by it feels like.  I seriously can’t believe I’ve been here for 3 weeks already.  4 months is already FLYING.  And I don’t like it.  Not one bit.

This week I feel like I’ve been able to have a good little break from Hinduism.  Well… you can’t really have a break from Hinduism while you’re in India, haha.  But I have had some fun experiences that were not so focused on Hinduism and were more focused on other things.

The other night we got to meet with a Borah Muslim.  Well actually, he’s part of a very small sect that broke of from the Borahs, which is a sect of Shi’ia Islam.  So he is pretty much part of a sect which is part of a sect which is part of a sect of Islam, hah!  Anyway, I got to interview him and he was the nicest most polite man!  They are so inviting.  The people here seriously just take you in and treat you like family.  He invited us to their mosque and some other events and it is going to be really fun and interesting to learn more about their practices.  Islam is such an interesting religion and I love learning about their beliefs.

I also made some friends in the branch!  On Sunday I went out to walk by the beach and through this park called Vuda Park with my two friends Santosh and Satish.  These guys are the coolest.  They seriously treat me like a queen… they are so respectful and kind and generous! They help me out with a lot of stuff and it’s been really cool to have friends here and also see what Indian life is like through people my own age.  Best experience at the park: they were both still in their dress shirts and the 3 of us were walking around.  A couple of people were asking them where I was from, and who I was as if I was someone important or something.  The best was when someone saw the three of us and thought that they were my bodyguards…. Hahahah.  We realized after that, well, yeah!  They did look like bodyguards in their white dress shirts, walking around with some white girl.  Hah.  Hilarious.  Here are some pics…

Look at these two! Just the cutest of friends :) haha

 And here we are on the beach... (seriously, look at how white I am! when I instagrammed this I hashtagged 'oreo'. fa real. I am a ghost.)

And then the other night they took me to an indian wedding.  Super cool and fun! (I didn't know that we were going there by the way, so I felt way underdressed in my salwar-kameez with my hair on top of my head haha.  Most people were wearing sarees, but that's ok.  It was a fun and random adventure! [please note also how crazy my hair is in all of these photos. yeah. both blow-dryer and straightener don't work here. healthy hair here I come!])

I seriously feel like my life right now is a Bollywood movie.  All it’s missing is everyone breaking out into song and dance at random moments!  But I am reminded of the movie Rang De Basanthi which is an awesome Bollywood movie… you should all watch it!!  It’s about this british girl who goes to India to film a movie project she has been working on for awhile.  She becomes part of a group of friends there (college age kids) and they all become really close as she follows them around on all their adventures and learns about them and indian culture through them and their experiences.  Anyway… there’s a lot more to the movie than just that, that’s only a very small part haha but I feel like I am that one ghostly white british girl who makes some friends in India and just follows them around on their adventures, eyes wide open through every experience because everything is so new and exciting.  At the wedding they introduced me to EVERYONE.  They were all just so thrilled to have a foreigner there.  I even had a lady (who I think is Satish’s friend’s aunt or something…??) invite me to dine with them, and to teach me Telugu, and to teach me how to wrap a saree, and to give me a saree.  Haha.  Such sweet and loving people here!!

Anyway… I feel like just hanging out with them I learn more about indian culture than anything else!  They are very aware of their culture and they have their own opinions of the good and bad things.  Yesterday I went to the church to study Telugu with them and while I was waiting some boys from the other branch invited me into the room they were studying in because the A/C was on in there (it was so hot yesterday!).  So I went in and they asked me about the project I am doing, and I told them my topic—“self discipline”.  One guy just starts out and says “I don’t think self-discipline is very hard” and I say “oh really? Why not?” and before he even gets a word in I say “WAIT! Can I record this??” haha.  So I pull out my little voice recorder, and a 2-hour interview with 5 college aged indian boys starts.  It was awesome!  We talked about freedom, rules and regulations, happiness, love, truth, the gospel, progression and potential, and the impact of culture.  I learned SO many interesting things.  Between them and other conversations and research I have done this week, here are a few key points I have learned.  I will write them as far as difference goes between America and India.  Of course there are exceptions to each, but I feel like these are things that are fairly accurate most of the time:

AMERICA: very free… tons and tons of options, that it’s almost overwhelming.  Endless possibilities.  Everyone has the potential of being great and doing what they want.  Very ambitious people, always reaching higher and seeking for more.  

INDIA: more limited.  People stay within what they grew up with or what they were taught and rarely branch out.  Not many possibilities or as much potential for progression or change.  People are very dedicated and content with their positions in life and don’t really care to reach for anything different.

AMERICA: very low self-discipline.  Lots and lots of addictions.  Honestly as sad as this is, it is a pretty promiscuous country haha.  Many people live according to their own personal desires or mostly fend for themselves.  Many broken families.  Many people act according to their emotions.  Everyone is constantly changing, fleeting around to wherever the next opportunity takes them.  SO many options that people are rarely satisfied.  Religion is present but not paid attention to and most people are not extremely religious or spiritually minded, although many believe in a higher power or being.  Very extreme in both ends of the spectrum… opportunity and success vs. bondage due to poor or immature choices and failure.

INDIA: very high self-discipline.  Very few addictions, apart from alcoholism which many have told me is the only real addiction here.  Very modest society and very morally clean… very few teen pregnancies, and most people practice sexual abstinence before marriage.  Many women still do not even go outside after 9:00 at night.  People live according to their roles in society and in their family.  The family structure is more important than the self and one’s life is constantly connected to their family… actions are dictated by what is needed by the family.  Kids have a huge respect for elders and for their parents and follow the duty of taking care of their family and parents.  People rarely change from their usual routine… they find their place in society, they focus on that, and they don’t let anything else distract them.  They live their lives focused on that role and don’t worry about living any other way.  Religion is a HUGE part of everyone’s lives.  I have never seen such a devoted people, whether it’s Hinduism, Islam, Christianity, or whatever else.  They believe what they believe and they act accordingly.  Very secure because when one follows their role in their family and in society, they always have their family’s support and life is kind of set in stone.

AMERICA: we search or pursue things outside of us.  Freedom, love, happiness, truth, joy, satisfaction, power, etc.

INDIA: they make or create things inside of them.  Freedom, love, happiness, truth, joy, satisfaction, power, etc.

So that makes me wonder… which is better?  To live in a more narrow but safe life, with not a ton of progression but a strong stability?  Or to live in a more open but dangerous life, with lots of possibility of progression but also a lot less stability?  I like to compare this to the commandments.  I think a lot of Indians live a strict life out of fear.  In fact, when I was interviewing the boys yesterday they told me that in school when they would mess up they would get beat, and so they learned to follow the rules and not mess up because they were so scared.  But is this real self-control?  Well, self-control is self-control, no matter what the motivation is to exercise it.  Although, the motivation to exercise it is still important and does make a difference.  I read in one of the church books (I can’t remember if it was True to the Faith or Gospel Principles) that it’s better to be obedient because you want to, rather than doing it out of fear.  However, doing it out of fear is better than not doing it at all.  It’s kind of like living off of borrowed light too… at least kids will do what is right when they follow their parents’ examples and live off of borrowed light, but it is much better for them to gain their own testimonies and be truly strong because living off of borrowed light, or being obedient out of fear, is not a very strong foundation.  I also asked them what would have happened if they would have grown up in a different culture where discipline wasn't so stressed, and they said they definitely wouldn't have learned so much self-control.  They said if they even went to other countries now they would take on the culture of that country and not live as strictly or tightly as they do here--while still keeping the commandments of course.

A few other things I found interesting were that they have a lot of self-control in the way that they lead their lives and especially with family and how they treat other people, but when it comes to the government they don’t care.  NO ONE obeys traffic laws.  Like, I have never seen anyone stop at a stop sign OR a red light.  Haha!  They don’t respect the police force or the government because it is so corrupt and they hardly have any hope for it to change, so they almost just ignore it.  In that aspect, there is a lot of chaos that goes on here. 

I also asked them about a couple of words and what they meant to them.  One of the words was love.  To Indians, love and happiness is something different than it is for us.  I noticed that all of their answers in one way or another had to do with commitment.  They talked about the love you have for a spouse because they are committed to you no matter what… they never leave.  Most people don't marry here because they 'fall in love'... they marry because it is a cultural norm and they know that it is their duty, and they marry someone who is approved by their family.  In fact, the family is usually the one who seeks out the spouse and then the consent of the child is taken in order for the marriage to happen... so it's a lot more about stability in life rather than love.  I feel like here, personal pursuits would get in the way of marriage.  Whereas in the states, marriage gets in the way of personal pursuits.  Divorce is possible here but is not common, even if the spouses are alcoholics or whatever else they still stay together because that’s just their culture. They also talked about how when you love someone or something, you focus on that one thing and devote your time and attention to it.  So there is that idea of commitment and stabilization again, which I feel like is such a big part of their culture here.  They are devoted and committed.

I guess a downside of all of this, like I said, is that sometimes this prevents progression or the opportunity to find something better.  But if they’re happy, does it really matter?  Maybe it does, maybe it doesn’t.  I remember thinking on my mission that I wished SO badly that the people would just open their hearts and their minds to having a better life and feeling the joy and happiness that comes from seeking out and learning the truth.  These boys also mentioned that they are so much happier now that they have joined the church and that their views on these subjects have changed since they have been members.  So I think it is important to have our minds open to view our potentials because maybe we are missing out on something that we never knew we could have.  At the same time, in American society (and seriously this is a problem with marriage in LDS culture and especially at BYU) people know that there is always something better so they continue to reach higher and search for that, and end up never satisfied or never actually finding it because they don’t know when to stop.  Interesting…

Also, I was talking to Rebecca and she told me a story that her sister shared about work.  She once had a job where she worked with a lot of people from China.  She noticed that they were extremely good at doing what they were told to do.  They had their task, and they did it perfectly.  But when it came to problem solving or being creative they were often lost and didn't know what to do.  I think Indian culture would be similar, so I guess there are just 2 different sets of skills.  In our culture we learn to be innovative and creative and solve problems, but because we are exposed to so many opportunities it is often difficult for us to focus on one task or be satisfied just doing one thing and being really good at that one thing.  Whereas here they learn to be content doing one thing and living a simple life, and they master it by being extremely focused and concentrated.  When something comes in their way though or an opportunity presents itself, they don't really know what to do with it. 

Anyway... as you can see, I am learning SO much.  The culture here is literally exactly opposite of ours (well, for the most part) and so I feel like the diversity is helping me learn a lot.  I am shocked at how conservative they are in some areas like dress and morality, where in North and South America we are totally opposite.  Even with so many western patterns coming into the society here, they have still been able to retain a lot of morality and values.  It is definitely changing though, and western culture is creeping in quickly and changing a lot of the pure Indian traditions that have made their culture the balanced and stable culture they are.  I think there are definitely pros and cons to the change, but it is sad to see the morals changing and worsening.

Well… like I said, time is flying way too fast and I am trying to keep up with everything and take in everything I’m seeing and experiencing and learning.  There are incredible people here.  I love them even more than I thought I would, for reasons different than I expected.  You all know how obsessed I was with this country before I came… well, I have found even more reason to be since I’ve been here and am so glad I finally made it here.  It has already been a life-changing experience and I hope to take home with me all of the things I am learning in order to implement them into my life.

If anyone has any thoughts or comments they are greatly appreciated!! Feel free to e-mail me. :) I love hearing other peoples’ thoughts and opinions! Peace ouuuuuuuttttttt

P.s. oh yeah. We were in the newspaper.  NBD.  Please see how photogenic we are.  Hahaha (and by we I mean myself.  Eyes closed and all.)